It’s Five Minute Friday today!
Last night, I found myself sitting in boys’ room, waiting for them to go to sleep.
This is something I have done every night for the past three million years or so.
I wait. And I watch them play Twister with the sheets. They ask for water. NOT tap. Cold water. They ask for ice cubes. Two. Not three. Three induces sobbing. They ask for the one book out of the four hundred that we have on the shelf that is not on the shelf.
They ask for me to stay.
I KNOW. I know. I shouldn’t stay.
I get them grumpy water and I toss a couple Clifford books on their bunks and try to wedge a stray stuffed hyena under one arm not hopelessly tangled in the Twisty sheets. “Here,” I say. “This is the Hyena of Blessed Sleep. He will protect and serve, my baby. Cuddle him up. AND GO TO SLEEP.”
And, then. They do.
Red did, last night. He fell asleep. It was a miracle, as it always is. One minute, he’s asking me, “Mommah, where does da slobber go?” (I know, I can’t even, it’s a mystery and disgusting, and I can’t I tell you.) And then? His little fluttery eyelashes are all soft against his cheeks, and his little hands are all plump and unclenched on the sheets that have formed a tight bond of cemented bedding around him in a way that will surely wake him up later, like at three a.m. when he will shout out, “Ima HOT! HOT. PLEASE COME HELP ME NOT BE SO HOT SO I CAN STAY UP UNTIL AT LEAST 4. OR, IF IT’S NOT AN INCONVENIENCE, MAYBE LATER!”
But that’s later. Right now, the sweet boy is finally asleep.
And I stare at him and Blonde (Asleep long ago. The weirdo.) like Harrison Ford did when he found the Holy Grail.
Why wait? Why not realize they are real treasures all day long?
Oh mommas, you know why. We wait for the next thing; we wait for the night we get sleep (kiss that dream goodbye), or when there is no more teething, or no more crying, or no more… whatever. We look to the next milestone as saving us from more waiting. Really, do you know what is saving us? Saving me?
Learning how to just stop waiting and start being.
I so do not have this figured out, this whole being in the moment thing. My babies, asleep, are the reset button I need after a day of bickering and that one incident in the bathroom with a Lego and the toilet. But I’m learning, with the help of God. He instructs me every day. And when I have a hard time learning?
It’s ok. He will wait.