Momsie is a G rated blog. And she’s recommending an (almost) X rated Netflix show.

StreamTeam_Red&White_BlackBackground.png

 

WAIT. Just stay with me, here, Ok?

This was me about five minutes prior to posting this:

Me: NO DON’T DO IT. CRAZY SAUCE. WRITE ABOUT PUPPIES.

Y’all. I’m not gonna write about puppies.

With the help of Netflix, I’m going to get serious with you.

I meant to post about some great Netflix shows for kids and teens and other heartening options, because yes, there are many there. I have gobs and gobs of things on Netflix that I watch that warm my soul and make me smile and make my children chortle with laughter…

Today is not such a day.

Today, I am recommending this:maxresdefault.jpg

Guys. This show broke. My. Heart.

Two years ago I spoke at the Whole Women’s Conference – a gathering for women who felt broken, lost, addicted, and all of the above. There, I met Annie Lobert, an ex porn star who had found Jesus, and whose mission is to offer assistance and ministry to women stuck in this industry.

And, yes, “stuck” is the right term.

I think… I think this post is going to upset some of y’all. I am so sorry. I’m going to post it anyway.

In this era of social media, amateur porn is blowing up. Did you know, Twitter still has NO sorts of filters, so basically anyone who has a Twitter account can access porn, free and easy, whenever they like?

The minimum age for a Twitter account is 13. The average age for a person to be exposed to porn? 11.

That’s in three years, for my oldest.

Amateur porn is here, and here’s one of its spokespersons:

“Amateurs come across better on screen. Our customers feel that. Especially by women you can see it. They still feel strong pain.”

So, here’s the deal. This show does not take an easy look at this. It’s not clearly anti-porn or pro. It is fairly unbiased. And for that, I am kind of grateful. Because… the girls’ faces. They don’t need to ask the leaning questions or mess with the dialogue or twist the events or MESS WITH IT AT ALL. THE GIRLS’ FACES.

Nobody really wants this life. And yet, it’s happening.

 

The website Fight the New Drug tells us: The main job for these girls? To look young. “Teen” is one of the top keywords in porn searches.      (http://fightthenewdrug.org/10-porn-stats-that-will-blow-your-mind/)

Guys. The IWF tells us: “Child porn is one of the fastest growing online businesses.”

It. Is. Everywhere.

I’m not a fan.

Maybe… you disagree. Maybe you see it as a choice, as a part of healthy human sexuality, as a part of expression and just being plain honest with ourselves. Maybe it’s empowering.

Maybe. But. Just look at their faces, ok? And, there’s so many of them. These girls. They don’t look like victims. They’re smiling. There’s hundreds of them. Or more. So… how can they be victims if SO many of them are signing up to be a click away for someone?

Just watch Hot Girls Wanted. And, there? Just look at their faces.

I do warn you – there is nudity and all the rest of it here. The film does not show the porn in action, but yes, nudity happens.  It’s not an easy film to watch. But, I did. And I cried. And, then I asked God three things:
I have two boys, and I cannot help but wonder – what will this industry be like when they are 11?
And also,  is there any way I can help those girls? Is there any way I could just hug on them, and tell them, somehow, what they’re worth? What they are really, really worth?
And, God, there are so many. Why? Why did we let this go for so long? Why weren’t we paying attention?
Ok, finally.
I read up on the definition of “exposed.” You know, to reveal, to uncover. To leave cold.
The antonym for exposed is “protect.”
And the final definition? Waaaaaay down the page, at the bottom, where you would miss it unless you’re an English teacher like me and kept reading?
Exposed: to leave a child to die.

This is Marriage.

Long while back I had a friend who told me to read the book Tuesdays with Morrie. It’s a really sweet, sentimental book.

I know. I have really no idea why she suggested it for me.

Anyhow, the premise is this: If you spend time with someone, on a daily basis, you should really, you know, get to know them. Because people are generally awesome. They have stories to tell and lives that are lived, and we should realize how precious time is with them.

I know. It’s really sweet. And very true. And so, I was thinking just this morning how I have this other person who is like HERE like, A LOT and when, really, was the last time I sat down with him and just dug deep into his soul and got to “know” him?

It’s the husband. I’m talking about the husband. FYI. In case you were wondering if I had lost my mind and was talking about Steve the Cat. Or my sons. I do know my sons, but honestly? Deep conversation with my sons doesn’t happen too often because children.

So today! I am posting another installment in my series called:

THIS IS MARRIAGE.

So, here’s how we talk:

Exhibit One: We are persistent about calcium.

 

Screenshot 2015-09-08 09.29.43

 

Exhibit two: We do not freak out about scary stuff. In fact, we don’t freak out at all, we just blithely respond like it’s no big deal, leaving SOME OF US TO HAVE TO DEAL WITH KILLER EVIL STINGER THINGS.

There’s no resentment here. None at all.

 

Screenshot 2015-09-08 09.28.37

Exhibit Three: We go the extra mile.

 

Screenshot 2015-09-08 09.25.52

 

Exhibit Four: We get real. We even use saucy language.

Screenshot 2015-09-08 09.31.06

Exhibit Five: We quote scripture at each other. And by that I mean, HE sends me all these really uplifting, wonderful, LONGGGGGGG texts the bible all OVER the place. And I respond with my favorite verse. Because it’s short.

Screenshot 2015-09-08 09.31.54

Note how he completely ignores my snark and just keeps right on being SO HELPFUL AND SPIRITUAL. AWESOME.

 

Exhibit Six: We are very very honest. And we understand each other’s needs. Mine are usually about food.

 

 

Screenshot 2015-09-10 11.46.31

Exhibit seven: We are always willing to help out. Like when the husband needs to get a refill on a prescription we are more than happy to send pix.  And we are patient.

Screenshot 2015-09-10 12.02.53

And more pix…

 

Screenshot_2015-09-10_12_03_03

Exhibit Eight: We like to enjoy the little things. Like our kid. Dressed like a bat.

Screenshot 2015-09-10 12.03.38

Exhibit Eight:  We are straight up, no snark, here for each other. Even when autocorrect fails. We pray. Especially when we are far away, at Whole Women’s Weekend, dealing with a lot of stuff, and really really just needing an “I love you.”
I always get the “I love you.”

Screenshot 2015-09-10 11.49.36

 

This is marriage.

BOOM. 🙂

 

Whole Women Weekend

Resolutions

 

There are a lot of blessings that come when you finally get real and get sober and stop living like a slave to stuff. I mean this in the nicest way, for all of you who read me and aren’t, well, stuck on booze or were, or are stuck on something else…

But you know? I am finding that the more I write about this, and the more I talk about it, the more women just keep coming to me and saying, “Yes. Me too. Me too. Thank you.” Or “Yes, that was me. And now it’s my friend, or my husband, or my son… or my brother.” So, in the spirit of the New Year and renewal and freedom, I want to share with you my friend, Crystal Renaud’s ministry and invite.

Crystal was my student, oh so many years ago. She was a quiet girl, very sweet, very, very good. She never got in trouble. She never was late with an assignment. Basically, she was the perfect student. And she was miserable inside.

I found all this out later, as she wrote a book and started up a ministry and we found each other on the great facebooks, and I said, “Hey, me too. I’m stuck on wine. I really, really like it. But I had to quit because, well, you know, it was drowning my soul.” And we had that connection that people in recovery do, that is just so darn awesome and deep and fulfilling that sometimes I kinda feel sorry for the normal people out there that they don’t get to experience this.

But then, well, they didn’t have to go through the whole addiction thing, so there’s that.

Crystal is heading up a conference for women in August. I will be a speaker at it. I am so excited to just be a part of this, and to help her ministry. And it will help me too, to talk and share and be of service. That’s a big thing in my circles, being of service. It really works.

I am sharing the link and some information below, in case you might be interested. I am so proud of Crystal. She has worked tirelessly to help other women who need it, and in doing so, she became the teacher for me.

Crystal writes:

“You are cordially invited to join us August 27-30, 2015 for Whole Women Weekend. Whole Women Weekend (formerly WHOLE Women’s Conference) is a unique weekend intensive retreat for women who are seeking true and lasting inner healing from hurts & hang-ups, trauma, bad habits, addictions, and more and who wish to encounter God in a way they never have before. No matter where you are on your spiritual journey or where you have been prior to now — this retreat is for you.

The theme for our 2015 retreat is IDENTITY. It is so easy to believe that your past defines who are you today. But what you have done or what was done to you does not define you. You are defined only by who you are in Christ.”

Here is the link to the Whole Women’s Weekend.

And here is a link to Crystal’s Whole Women Ministries.

And here’s a link to Crystal’s awesome book.

51OLPuOFc3L

Happy New Year to you. I am going to celebrate it with some chicken soup, and chocolate pie, and something on the Netflix, I am sure. I will also be in bed around ten. I know, I am an animal.

It’s possible that some hot tea and knitting will be mixed in there. It’s how I roll.

images

And, I ask, what will your word for 2015 be? Watch for upcoming posts on that one.