Y’all. Life is hard.
I pretty much fully realized this little nugget of wisdom when I realized that giving birth meant discomfort.
Here is a visual of how life is hard: (Don’t WORRY. No birthing pictures here. I am not that crazy.)
Our family had a great weekend.
I know, my leader set you up to make you think that this was going to be another post of misery and woe, because there are toddlers in the house, but it was actually not so bad. And I do realize they’re not really toddlers that much anymore, even though I insist on calling them so. And, why was our weekend so awesome?
The Wonderful Husband Played The Game of LIFE With Them for Three Hours Straight, and I just sat and watched.*
The Game of LIFE (this is how the boys refer to it – it must be called, full on, with much fanfare, The Game of LIFE. Much like that one dude has to be called now The Artist Formerly Known as Prince. Or, how I refer to my twenties as The Time When I Could Eat Whatever I Wanted. The name matters, y’all.)
The Game of LIFE involves mortgages and buying things and basically putting yourself in crippling debt, and what five year old wouldn’t think this is a blast? They have no concept of reality, folks. Of course they don’t. Their job is to bludgeon US with reality.
The husband, sweet clueless blonde, decided to be a farmer for his profession. Thus, he lost his patience with LIFE around the time his crops were lost in a freak monsoon, and he was left with five dollars and a roller skate for transportation. But he bravely continued. It was his row to hoe. (SEE WHAT I DID THERE?. I HAD TO.)
The two boys fared better. Overheard:
“I wanna buy another house! I wanna buy ALL da houses!”
“Is that the luxury model of dat car? Cuza I have no luxury model. I need it.”
“Baby! I have der baby! I’m all married now and I get a baby! Bring on da babies!”
“More! MORE MORE MORE MORE! Must have ALL THE THINGS!”
It’s a great little game. It teaches fiscal responsibility, how to deal with depression, and that babies can only occur after you hit the jackpot of MARRIAGE!!!!! on the Life Pod. This gadget replaced the original spinner. And, this game has CREDIT CARDS. For reals. Life just got rather real-ish. Nuthin’ says grownup like huge plastic debt.
I must admit, the baby one really kind of threw me for a loop. They were so terrifying thrilled with the idea.
After three hours, two bowls of popcorn, and rapid aging on the husband’s part, we were done. Blonde had won. He had finished the game with same amount of money as our national debt, plus three children.
Red was quick to point out that ending the game of LIFE pretty much meant they were all in heaven. Wow. That killed the moment a bit (AGAIN! I know, right?).
And the husband collapsed on the couch next to me, exhausted from all the bills and mortgages and car payments and career struggles.
Momsie, the eternal band-aid fixer of the family, remedied the situation with this:
1. Ice cream
Boom. All better!
After the boys were in bed**, we watched this:
This little show is a gem. Better Off Ted satires the workplace in a way that I haven’t really laughed at so well since, well, the husband had to become a sharecropper. The main character (aptly called, Ted) works at Veridian Dynamics, a research company that creates… I’m not sure. And I don’t think the workers there know either.
Each episode of BOT (my acronym. Like GOT, but, not) gives us a glimpse at life, work, career, and just how nutball all those things mixed together can be, with sizzling accuracy.
I don’t often laugh out LOUD when I watch television. I don’t know why. Perhaps it’s not demure, which I am, of course. Or it’s because there just isn’t much to laugh at anymore because, well, bad television,
But I LAUGH a lot with this show. It’s medicine for the soul, I tell you.
And if you don’t take your medicine… well then, you could lose your sense of humor when you end up on welfare, while playing a board game with your two millionaire children.
Watch the following. Why? Because it’s chock full of antibiotics, for your soul.
* Ok, I didn’t just sit and watch. I also: folded laundry, graded papers, and wrote this post. Moms don’t just sit and watch. It’s not in our contract.
** This show does have saucy bits, just so you know. The hubs and I accept the saucy bits. The Game of LIFE rather forced them upon us.