Recently my boys finished up their baseball season with the Epic Last Game of Awesomeness.
- Totally undefeated in their league. They are scrappy, y’all.
- The other team? Also undefeated. And in a league up.
- This means, yes, they were better than us.
- Also their team had totally pristine white uniforms. And team cheers. And a sort of “we are Big Time” vibe going on. It was annoying.
- I still show you love, other team though, because you are kids and you have mothers too. But, the cheer thing was super annoying. We didn’t have cheers. I considered trying to make one up on the fly, but that sort of thing never works for me. I tried to start The Wave once and I just ended up looking like the poor schwub that was having some sort of glee moment while people stared. Awkward.
- But! Plot twist! We had a LEAD in the third inning! I nearly levitated out of my seat. So exciting. Other team was rattled, I could tell. We had ’em shaking in their pristine white pants.
- We went into overtime because we were killing it.
- But, plot twist: Two errors in final play; they got a home run; we lost.
- Total heartbreak and crying and sadness.
- The end.
I mean, honestly. In the Bad News Bears, they win. In The Sandlot, they win. So does the dog. In A League of Their Own? THEY WIN. I’m telling you, THE UNDERDOG ALWAYS WINS.
We, however, did not win.
Ughhhh. Life is so hard, guys. Sometimes? It just stings.
The walk to the car was rough, let me tell you. We walked in silence. I kept trying to drum up an inspirational speech or two, but mostly? I just really REALLY wanted them to win. I just did.
Later that week, as I was folding clothes, I held up Blonde’s jersey and asked him if he wanted it in with his normal t-shirts.
“NO,” he stated. “That thing? It’s unlucky.” The whole thirteen thing, you know.
Now, we don’t much truck with superstition around here. And I started in on lecture #34777 about Now That’s Just Silly, Blonde and Here’s Why,
But then I stopped. The kid was entitled to his opinion. And, also, I have pretty much figured out that when I start in on my lecture series, both boys just end up hearing that “Whomp-whomp” voice of the teacher from Charlie Brown.
Here’s what I do know:
Both boys want to play ball again. The agony of defeat was real, but it’s just defeat. It’s not a dead-end. It hurts like crazy but so do a lot of things.
And you know I so want to put some sort of Feel Good Inspirational Big Finish here, but I… well I got nuthin.
Lately there has been some mention of how “lucky” I am – with the blog and the book and all of it. And I keep smiling and nodding and thinking, “Y’all. I’ve been on this hustle for 6 YEARS. That’s not LUCK that’s just work. And also? I just received yet another rejection in my inbox this morning, along with the five majillion I got last week, so NO NOT LUCKY IN THAT EITHER.”
Ok, calm down, Momsie.
Luck is overrated. Or impossible. Or imaginary. It’s in the land of unicorns, you guys. And I think that’s a good thing. The hard stuff? The rejections and the “you’re not good enoughs” and “sorry not today” and all of it? They hurt because I care and dang it – I CARE about this life of mine with all its bylines and deadlines and I am so grateful for that.
So that’s my Lecture on Luck. Thank you for actually listening (maybe?) and not hearing the “whomp whomp” voice in the background. I’m glad I have you. I’m so very lucky.
Well, you know what I mean.